Wait, Guys, Wait!

When my first son was four or five, he was just learning to ride a bicycle.  At the end of our street he slid on some loose leaves and sticks.  As he fell off of his bike his hand struck a thorn from a locust tree.  Screaming, he ran up to me, hand held high, terrified by the sight of a two-inch locust thorn (barely) sticking into the palm of his hand.  My wife Lisa stuck her head out the door to see what all the noise was about.  Together, we tried to examine the injury.  I reached out to pull the thorn from his hand, but this only terrified him more.  He jerked his hand back, yelling "Wait guys, wait.  I don't want to die.  Leave it in; I don't want all my blood to run out."

Fast-forward fifteen years.  My now nineteen-year-old son is getting ready to sign a contract with the U.S. Government to serve in the Navy.  This is a major commitment.  My wife and I have driven hundreds of miles to meet him for dinner to see if he realizes the magnitude of this decision, to see if he thinks he should maybe think this over a little bit before proceeding.  And in my head, I find myself shouting "Wait guys, wait!"

Sometimes you just want to stop the world for a while so you can think things over.  "I'm getting a puppy" he says.  Wait guys, wait.  Are you sure you want to do that?

"I'm moving to Virginia."  Wait guys, wait. 

"I'm getting married."  Wait guys, wait.

"We're having a baby."

As they get older, the decisions get bigger, and I find myself wondering, are they really ready?  Do they really know what they are doing?

But then I say, did I?

I seem to remember MY parents asking me, "Are you sure you want to do that?"  I'll bet they were thinking, "Wait guys, wait."

When my son was about twelve or thirteen he told me that he didn't think it would be that hard to drive, since he had been watching ME drive for so many years.  But we all know that is a joke.  When your son starts driving, the time for instruction is really over.  He is moving from watching to doing.  This transition has to occur.  He will never learn to drive by reading about it, or by watching me drive.  I have to move from the driver's seat to the passenger seat.  I have to learn to be content watching him drive.  I can give advice, but only he can do it.

It's the same with life.  You can either say, "Wait guys, wait" or you can slide over to the passenger seat.  My advice to you dads:  slide on over, but hang on for dear life.  It can get pretty scary...and fun...and rewarding...and wonderful.

Don't wait.

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I am interested in your thoughts.  What advice would YOU give?  Reply at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .