The first in a series on lessons learned about promoting healthy marriage and healthy relationships over the last ten years.

My husband, Paul, wears hearing aids. While these have improved our communication immeasurably over the last 3-4 years, we still struggle from time to time. Recently, I thought we were talking about filling the bird feeder, while he was wondering if we needed to include a special seat at the table for our infant granddaughter. He occasionally accuses me of talking to him from another room and expecting him to hear (which I will confess to sometimes doing). I fault him with being distracted by his iPad, the television or some other activity. Usually, these exchanges are quite humorous; at other times, they are very frustrating. In some ways they mirror the conversations I’ve had with people over the years about the importance of healthy marriage.

“Nearly ten years!” that’s the thought that occurred to me as I was sitting in a meeting last week. Ten years ago, in 2002, four of us (three have since moved from the area) put our heads together and dreamed about what it might be like if we could encourage a more “marriage friendly” culture in our community. We wondered if community leaders in business, education, health care, the faith-community and other venues were aware of the difference healthy marriage made in the lives of children, adults and the community as a whole. We speculated about how relationship education might help couples form and maintain a safe, stable and happy home, thereby improving outcomes for children. We questioned if there were any coordinated efforts in our area to make people aware of existing resources. We decided to have a series of seven focus groups to find out.